21 posts tagged “learning to write”
So I've got 3 pieces "out there" now, so we'll see.
I've got another one that I think is close.
I've finished reverse-engineering my favorite author's latest novel -- just to learn how the master did it. From that exercise I've boiled down an outline or template of novel-writing. (Well, it worked for her...)
Now I'm going to take a couple of my bigger pieces (that seemed to want to balloon out well beyond the 5000-word limit of most short stories, and try as I might, I couldn't stuff them back in) and try to map them onto this template. And then see if I can't develop a working outline and then crank out a real novel or two. Or three. Or four.
And moreover, I've had a few encouraging conversations over the past few days from people who want to try and hire me, one way or another (either as direct staff or as contract employee thru my marketing communications firm). And in the end nothing may come of those efforts, but just having those conversations brightened my life considerably.
And Eldest Son made a very responsible choice the other day, for which I was quite proud of him. He's not supposed to chew anything hard and crunchy or soft and sticky, lest he break his appliance (rapid palatal expander). So when the barber offered him his choice of Tootsie-Pops... HE TURNED IT DOWN. He actually chose not to get a Tootsie-Pop, in order to live up to a rule. Wowza!
So. Stuff's okay, today.
Cheers.
Our church play-park has skywheels.
Basically, these are like monkey-bars, except they turn freely. So they are quite challenging for kids to get across, even kids who can do monkey bars well. Because you have to manage your momentum just right to swing the wheel you're on close enough to grab the next one, and so on. You have to be not only strong, but also fast and coordinated. You have to get in a groove, get into a rhythm.
It's tough.
Only one kid could do it right away, a year ago, and a lot of kids still can't do it.
Eldest Son can't do it.
Precious Princess can.
She did it for the first time about a month ago, and then she did it again that same day, so we know it wasn't a fluke.
She did it again last night, when we all stopped by to put the finishing touches on Phase II (benches, picnic table, bouncy whale).
She tried and tried and tried for a year -- and failed for a year -- and now she can do it.
She's five.
That's like, me working toward -- and failing at -- a challenge for, oh, about EIGHT YEARS.
Kind of puts everything in perspective.
(I've always been impatient.)
I've only been working on my writing, I mean really WORKING, for going on 2 years.
Last summer, I was nowhere near being published. This summer, I've had 2 near misses. Two pieces that made the short list, but not the final cut, at two different publications. Plus the two pieces that made finalist in that contest, even though they didn't win.
So really, that's a lot of progress in a year's time. And 2 years AGO at this time, I didn't have anything. Not one single piece that even I would have considered finished.
Patience, girl. And never quit.
Failure is only temporary.
(Dear Precious Princess! I've learned so much from her already, and she's only been around for 5 years...)
Just wanted to share a weird thing that has become crystal clear to me over the past month or so of revising my short fiction.
I know this is going to sound obvious, and everyone knows it, right, but it's different to really feel it. To see it on paper, as it were -- or pixels at least. (Also I don't want to scare anyone -- this is true of every writer, not just me, so...)
Since all my characters come from inside my head, they're me.
They're all me, some aspect of me. Even the villains. Even the ones to whom horrible things happen. Even the men. Even the children.
Even the monsters.
But on the other hand, in writing, it's a safe place to let all these goblins loose.
Like, f'rinstance, the piece I've been revising most recently. It's an ensemble piece, with one protagonist but a fairly large cast of fairly important friends and enemies who interact with him. And what I've realized in reading and rereading and heavily revising this piece is, the protagonist and every member of the ensemble are all like little sub-personas of me. Me in various moods and situations. Even though they're all very different from each other.
It's really weird to see my own self fractured and reflected in the crazy little mirrors of these characters.
And, the awful things that my poor protag has to go through... some psychoanalyst could have a field day with what's gnawing away at me, the real me, based on what goes on in my stories. (Or at least what was when I first wrote it, two years ago... my recent stories have been quite different...)
(Which makes me REALLY wonder about Stephen King...)
You might be wondering why I'm so obsessively pursuing publication for my writing at present, when I'm supposedly gearing up to go back to work.
The reason is, that I want to get as much done with my writing as possible, before I don't have as much time as I'd like to work on it any more.
I do think that I can still work on it after the kids go to bed. Maybe that's being overly optimistic. But at least I can try. But, that will still add up to, at most, half the time I get to spend on it nowadays.
This was from The Big One. The best-known, widest-read, most exclusive genre pub out there.
Why I'm so happy:
Because it wasn't QUITE a form letter!!!
(Believe me, I know; I GOT a form rejection from them a year and a half ago, and this is NOT the same!)
This letter was actually signed by the actual assistant editor who read the piece; the form letter was "signed" by the main editor (who no doubt had never laid eyes on that first rejected piece a year and a half ago).
Although he decided to pass and said that, overall, the story did not succeed in holding his interest, he actually said, quote: "There are some amusing moments in customer support opening section."
Now. That may seem like faint praise to you... but to get any editor at THIS mag to say ANYTHING even remotely positive about a story, using an actual example that showed he read it (at least part of it)... is a Big Deal.
So.
That same story?
-- I've already turned around and submitted it electronically to the next place on my list.
Wish me luck!
Just got the results of the contest where I entered 2 stories.
The good news is, my two stories WERE among the 12 finalists.
The bad news is, they were NOT among the 3 winners.
But, I find this encouraging.
Given the total number of entrants, being among the top 12 is pretty darned good. It helps me believe that my own recent self-assessment is not so far off the mark -- that my pieces are better than 90 - 95 % of what's out there, but still are not quite in the top 97th - 99th percentile. And that's where they need to be in order to be published (or win, in the case of this contest).
So, that's encouraging b/c it says that (a) I have an accurate view of my current skill level, (b) I'm not being totally unrealistic in my dream, and (c) that a breakthrough might be just around the corner. (Well, it might.)
And I'll never know if I stop sending things out.
And also that I shouldn't stop improving them, either.
B/c the totally unanticipated bonus of having entered this contest was, the ding-letter included a fairly detailed assessment from the judges of what they LIKED about each story... and what could have been improved, or, why it didn't WIN.
And THAT will be VERY helpful indeed. Moving forward.
The judges' assessments of what could be improved about each piece -- it was one of those things where you go, "D'Oh! They're RIGHT! Why didn't I think of that???"
What they liked: In the case of BOTH stories: characterization and world-building. In the case of one story, its compliments included "capable writing" and "very original idea"; the other one garnered the praise, "Great villain!" In both cases, the beginnings needed to be tightened/shortened, and the endings seemed abrupt or didn't quite fit.
Part of that was the short upper limit on word-count: 3500 words. I think the abrupt endings came from getting to around, oh, 3200 words and going "Oh S***!" and wrapping everything up in 300 words or fewer. But of course, if I had shortened up the beginnings, I'd have had a few more words to spare to feather in the endings a bit more satisfactorily.
And the other part was that I stumbled across this contest not too far in advance of the deadline, so the stories didn't get as many rounds of crit as I might have liked. Maybe another few drafts would have helped me gain the courage or hard-heartedness to hack away whole paragraphs or sentences from the beginnings. So next year I'm going to keep my eye on that contest and get their "theme" as soon as they release it, and give myself more time.
(Oh, I should mention, this annual contest requires you to submit a story based on a "theme" they set. The themes are pretty whacked -- this year's theme was "metallic feathers" and last year's was "fewmets at the end of time." Since no one could possibly have predicted such a theme and written a story about that beforehand, this pretty much ensures that all entries are written expressly for their contest; can't dust off your old stuff and send it in.)
Anyway.
So.
Onward!
Bah.
Just got another one today.
That's what you get for throwing stuff at the "qualified pro" mags. Reality is, they have only enough space in a year's issues to print 3 out of every 1000 stories submitted by unknowns.
Which means, my story could be better than 95% of the stuff they see... and still not be good enough.
(Yet.)
Has to be better than 99.7% of the stuff they see. And, has to hit the right sub-editor on the right day in the right mood.
"Oh God, PLEASE not another vampire unicorn story! PLEASE!" --Toss.
(He-e-ey... a vampire unicorn! Now THERE'S an idea...)
Well, so, the stars haven't aligned yet.
Yet.
Won't accept as reality the highly disheartening receipt of two rejections lately.
Won't.
Those two stories just haven't found the right markets.
Yet.
And, I still haven't heard anything yet on the 3 pieces remaining outstanding, any one of which (IMHO) is better, really, than the two that have recently been tossed on the dungheap of history.
And, I still have one in development that's very close to being ready to submit.
And umpteen more that are just clamoring to be brought to life. Clamoring.
So, NO, I'm not going to reopen my search for a day job, I'm not going to be reasonable, be sensible, get real, I'm not, I won't.
NO, I said.
NO, I won't.
NO!
***
(the foregoing tantrum brought to you by the mother of Eldest Son, who just thought you might be interested to know where he got his stubborn streak... apple don't fall far from the tree, do it? D'Oh!!)
***
Huuuuu.
Huuuuu.
(that was me breathing deeply -- see earlier post on Eldest Son's Mother's Day book entry, "My Mother is very good at...")
***
Okay. All calm now. Brave determination mask firmly back in place over seething mire of insecurity.
Gonna go kick the butt of my latest work in progress, right now!
- C
Last night I finally broke through my block on my problem story.
Yeah! Now I like it again. I'm just... just gonna sit on it for a few days at least, to make sure the new pieces I added yesterday seem smoothly integrated into the whole, not chunked in at the last minute (even though they were).
That's the trouble with editing. You write a couple hundred new words here, cut out a hundred or two words there... and even though the story as a whole has been through umpteen iterations, you still have the NEW pieces that need to be reviewed and (possibly) edited AGAIN. Usually I'm okay with cutting off this process, at least enough to send it off for a friend to review, but with THIS story, somehow...
I feel, right now, that it's ready to send out. (Version 8, good gravy!) But, I've been sorry before for sending out something too soon. Or as one of the published authors who led last fall's Conclave Writers' Workshop put it, "Don't serve undercooked food." (What fabulous words; no wonder he's published!) Don't serve undercooked food. I tell myself that every time I'm tempted to send something out the VERY SECOND I finish it. It's tough to hold back sometimes (like now), but it's a form of self-discipline.
And now I can move on to something new, while I let that one bake for a bit. Something I've been wanting to finish.
Onward!
Everybody's all healthy now. Just been busy lately, extremely busy.
Had a riproaring week, though not in a bad way. But enough so that Dear Husband was exceedingly relieved when he asked me what was on the agenda for tomorrow night, and I said, "Nothing. You're grilling chicken breasts for dinner, and we're hanging out at home."
And enough so that I was exceedingly relieved, nay, blissed-out, when he reminded me that he is off work tomorrow. His generous employer observes Memorial Day as a 4-day holiday instead of 3, and he gets tomorrow off as well as Monday.
O.M.G., I feel like me again! I've been depressed for so long (even with the medication, I now realize -- it just made me bearable, didn't make me me), and now I'm finally, finally me again!
I got so flippin' much done this week! It's unbelievable. I actually organized the kitchen counters! On top of everything else we did this week! Now, that may not seem like much, but, come on, you all saw my kitchen counter back in February when I posted about my 15th wedding anniversary, complete with photo of my roses on my kitchen counter. And it only got worse since then, believe me.
When I found myself preparing my family's meals on the 8 or 10 inches closest to the counter's edge, because the rest of the counter was entirely covered in a foot-high mound of crap (metaphorically speaking), I said, "Girl, something's got to change."
So, hah! DID that. Check!
(I love to make lists, and check them off. It is the most deliciously satisfying feeling, making that little check mark!)
Okay, Big Kid Items since last update:
- Littlest Brother has been moved to a Big Boy Bed!
His crib and dresser/changing table having been schlepped off to Aunt J's parents, who are, even as I type, schlepping off down to Tennessee (a roughly 8-hour drive from hereabouts) to deliver said furniture along with all of the baby shower gifts to J & B in anticipation of MY FIRST NIECE's arrival next month. Yippee!!
Although I must admit to a pang as I was contemplating L.B.'s "last night in the crib" and "last nap in the crib" and so on -- the crib which has seen continual hard use by my children over the past 7-1/2 years. It served us well and truly is NOT much worse for the wear! I would definitely recommend the Childcraft brand of baby furniture.
- Continuing with the Big Boy theme, L.B. has taken to sitting on the toilet and attempting to go "peedle" first thing in the morning after we take his diaper off. And this morning he actually did it! Peedled into the potty! He was absolutely bursting with pride. So, I'm thinking potty training is on the horizon. I really detest potty training, on the whole, but I think L.B. MAY be easier than the older two were. He's SO motivated to be Big Boy.
- Eldest Son got a set of Bunk Beds! His old twin bed having been handed down to Littlest Brother. He of course insists on sleeping on the top bunk, and loves it. Absolutely adores it. Couldn't be happier.
- Also, tonight was Eldest Son's class "Rainforest" event. Their entire classroom has been decorated as a rainforest, complete with paper vines and animals, for the past month, and the children have been busy learning about, you guessed it, rainforests. They each chose an animal to become an expert on, and he chose the Macaw. He did a fabulous job at tonight's presentation, telling about the Macaw.
And, I noticed several important areas of progress for him during the related projects leading up to tonight's event. He showed new capacity for accepting adult advice, for changing his plan mid-stream when the first plan didn't work out, for continuing on a project even after he got frustrated with it -- for coming back to it after a cooling-off period and solving the problem. All of these things are tremendously encouraging for me to witness, because I know only too well from past experience how much it could have gone differently (read: worse).
And finally -- I got my first rejection from my most recent bout of story-submitting! Yeah!
And know what I did? I revamped the opening a tad bit, hoping to sharpen up the "hook". And I sent it out AGAIN, to a DIFFERENT publication! Yeah!
And I'm going to KEEP submitting it until either I use up my list of pubs that I think would be a good fit for it (in which case I'll retire it temporarily, let it rest a bit and work on some other things), OR one of them buys it! YEAH!
So THERE!
AND, last week Friday I submitted what I think is maybe my best bet yet. So, we'll see how that goes.
So, I still have 5 stories out there at this point.
And I'm wallowing in the mire of this one darned story that just keeps getting worse and worse.
Six months ago, it seemed like my best story yet. Seemed like it really didn't need much polishing in order to send it out. And then, and then everything I tried just made it WORSE. And I just got SO SICK OF IT, I literally couldn't stand the sight of it. I became completely incapable of judging whether the latest changes were in any way an improvement over the previous version, or if the entire thing was just a load of crap. Gee, maybe I should change it to present tense. Gee, maybe I should rewrite it from the point-of-view of the ficus tree. Gee, maybe I should write it in second person. And finally I decided to just take a fresh approach, and start over again on a blank sheet of paper.
No, no, no, don't worry, I didn't junk it. What, 're you kidding? I am constitutionally UNABLE to throw ANYTHING away, even when my entire house is being drowned in clutter. (Think: Tribbles. Made out of paper. Stacks and stacks of paper. And toys. Floods and floods of brightly-colored chunks of plastic, knee-deep in places.) Never mind my hard drive. My hard drive is essentially boundless for the kind of files I keep, and at least old computer files don't pile up in the meatspace, and threaten to topple over, burying small children under an avalanche of paper and Barbie-doll shoes. No, of course I changed the file name and still have ALL of the versions of this story -- all 7 of them to date, PLUS the all-new one.
So, I'm behind on my self-imposed deadline for getting this story in shape for submission, but I think it'll be worth it.
Okay, I've GOT to got to bed.
Toodle-oo!!
